He Liked It, So He Put A Ring On It | Rhya's Engagement

I remember being twelve years old burying a “dream box” in a secluded field between two trees. I was going to be a world-traveling ballerina. Ha ha ha… Oh, if only I could go back and have a little chat with that girl.

Rhya (pronounced R-eye-ya, not Reeeeya or Ryan or R....how do you say your name?) wanted to be a singer. I’m sure if she could fast-forward to 2007 and see who Britney Spears became, she probably wouldn’t have chosen her role in “Crossroads” as her role model.

Rhya and I as 17 year old babies. 

I think for as long as I can remember, above all else though, we wanted to be wives and mothers… the matriarchs of large, loving families that hosted Sunday dinner every week. It was easy for me to picture her becoming those things – her overflowing love that pours from her heart, her inability to put her needs and desires before anyone else’s. Her relentlessness – in all things. One simply cannot tell Rhya everything is “fine” if it is not. You will never get her to SHUT UP if you lie about your feelings.

Rhya opened my heart and mind to brighter days. I would love to write all day about how she has influenced me and helped shape the woman I am now. The friend I am. The wife I am. The mother I am. Unfortunately, I’m on a jam-packed plane with no legroom or privacy to cry alone, so the Marine next to me is probably getting creeped out by my not-so-silent sniffles.

Rhya has invested more time in her attempts at self-discovery than any other woman I know, I’m sure. So many nights in middle school, high school, college, in all phases of our lives, spent on the phone, her second-guessing herself, her choices, her college major, her life-goals, and men (boys at that time…. another conversation I would like to have with us if I could time travel).

When Rhya re-committed her life to Jesus…. Well frankly I’m having a hard time finding the words to describe the change. For anyone who knew Rhya pre-Jesus, she was as positive as a sunflower. Is that a thing? I’m not sure. But when I think of sunflowers, I think of Rhya’s smile…maybe that’s why sunflowers are my favorite flower.

Catch my drift?

Suddenly nothing else mattered. God had a plan and she was going to follow the path that He was clearing, even on the rainiest of days and her faith was tested. Her patience was tested. Yet in true Rhya-fashion, she was relentless. She prayed. She followed. And she led others, led me. If there was a way to be more positive than the Old Rhya, she was.

I whole-heartedly believe that Jesus led her right to David’s heart. In fact I remember calling her crazy when she told me she was going to marry him. She hadn’t even met him yet for crying out loud!!! She texted me, “download this song – Walk With Me by David Daubert” so I jump on iTunes and download it and I’m like, “cool. Good song.” And she replied, “yeah, it’s about me. I’m going to marry him.”

Yeah. And I’m going to marry George Clooney. << Seriously, that’s what I said.

Turns out David was a youth leader at our church, and they soon met. The two actively committed themselves to becoming leaders in the Young Life program. Over time the relationship grew and above all else, when Rhya spoke of David, it was always “his friendship” -- what his friendship meant to her and how it influenced her and … wait for it… how he made her want to be a better person.

Are those the magical words? For me, that’s when I knew Mike would be my husband. How he challenged me (oh, he still does….) but he appreciated my strengths and brought light to my weaknesses and instead of being critical of them, we worked together to improve them. Simply, he made me want to be a better person. Try harder. Find out what my limits were and push them. Push myself. He still does this daily, almost five years later.

That’s when I knew David would be around for a while. Imagine my {lack of} surprise when they returned from an incredible “West Coast Adventure” with a ring on her finger. She flew him to California and Washington to meet her family and I had a strong suspicion there was a step to follow… and I was right!

Rhya stopped by one day after work, shortly after her trip and held up her teeny little hand and there was a new ring on it!!! I can’t remember ever seeing Rhya smile like that. I would love to tell you how David proposed because it was pretty creative, but I’ll let Rhya share that herself. {{Maybe she should start a blog documenting the events leading up to the wedding and beyond???}}

About 30 minutes into our mini celebration in my basement, it dawned on me that I was scheduled for deployment during the time she is planning to be married. I felt a dark cloud shift over that room as our hearts both sunk to the pits of our stomachs. How could I let my BFF get married without me? But how could I tell her that?

I didn’t have to. Rhya said she wasn’t walking down the aisle without me and wanted to shift her wedding six months to the right. I could NOT let that happen.

A few days at work passed and I was in the middle of a very emotional email to Rhya telling her I wouldn’t be at the wedding and was just about to send it when I got a note that I was being swapped out. I could be there for the wedding. I called Rhya right away and I think we both shed a few tears at how excited we were.

I will still miss every event leading up to this day. The most exciting day for her, to date. I know I will struggle being half way around the world while she plans her engagement party, bridal shower, bachelorette party, picks our her dress, her flowers, the table settings. My heart is breaking all over again at the thought of it. But come hell or high water, I will be by her side on the day that she crosses the bridge into wife-hood, like she has been there for me throughout every major event in my life. 

Rhya-Roo. My best friend, my sister. You know I don’t believe in soul mates, but if I did, I would think David is yours. I am so happy to watch your relationship with David grow and witness what God will you use you both for, now as a couple, and individuals.

I will miss you and your planning process for this monumental day over the next nine months but I am with you everywhere and I’m sure you’ll hear me giving you advice that you’ll never take along the way, even if it’s just there in your head. I love you, and David, and I celebrate the life you are creating with him.

Then again maybe I'm not that sad.... ;-)

Happy Engagement.

Love,

Laurie-Loo